On Introverts &
Extroverts
There is this book on introverts that I already have a copy of
but have yet to find time to read. Its title mentions the line “in a world that
can’t stop talking”.
I've recently discussed introverts with an academic
professional and I told her about said book and we've proceeded to discuss in,
a nutshell, the world that cannot stop talking.
It is true this world has increasingly become so busy,
cluttered and noisy, and extroverted people tend to get most of the advantages.
People have such short attention spans that it tends to really just fall on
whoever wants to be noticed to get noticed.
You would say, you want to advance then work for it, be
heard. Ok. But what if you’re a much more brilliant person who just happened to
be an introvert? And what if that other guy is not particularly brilliant but
just so good at being flamboyant, listening to other people’s ideas and then later
re-imaging it as his/her own? Cutthroat people would applaud that. In a House of
Cards would, they would say that's great.
Some people would say, in order to win in this world, that's how it’s
supposed to be. And,
perhaps, more often it’s true, that is how it really is.
In this day and age, if people don’t know anything about
you, they assume you have nothing and are nothing. If you don’t say anything, they
assume you've nothing to say.
And so, introverts, you lose. Or so they say.
On Opinion & Silence
And what about having an opinion? What if what you have to say is not synonymous
with what the mainstream wants you to say?
Some people make a stand and get shredded for it. They get
perceived as a threat, are suddenly judged or are just simply silenced.
So some people chose to remain silent because they prefer to
play it safe, or they are just simply the follower type or they just have no
particular opinion at all.
It is funny, when you sometimes find yourself
damned if you do (speak) and damned if you don’t (speak). Don’t speak and be
forgotten. Speak and be attacked for it.
So, what’s the point?
Often there is a struggle between following the crowd and being
true to who you are. That is, if who you are, isn't necessary compatible to
what sells in your reality.
As a
student of business and marketing, it is important to look into the market and
then adapt your product and strategies to what will sell.
But as a person, if you do this, there is this unsettling
feeling (for some people) and you wonder if you are selling out or becoming a
different person, and wonder if you do really want this to happen?
Hence, the internal struggle, the frustration, the
disheartening feelings… etc.
Power players will say this whole concept is for the weak.
And so, I was more than happy to get a totally differently
perspective from the person that I was talking to.
I was not told it was weak. I was not told that one needs to
change, to be aggressive, or to be overtly noticeable to make it.
In fact, I was told that there is power in silence. And, that there is something noteworthy in knowing your worth and just sticking with it.
I was told that there is more power to being different than
there is to being one of them.
Yes, we've also heard this one before. Be the red in the sea of black. Take the road
less traveled. Who knows, you may be the ugly duckling? Etc.
In theory, we are also told that to get noticed, you must be
different and unique. In reality though, it seems, being the “best” and most
noticeable one of the mainstream ideal is what is actually rewarded.
But still, there is a truth there, though rarely championed these
days, that there is power in being different because there is power in having
something that everyone else does not have. It’s a simple concept we often forget, really.
What proceeded was a brief yet inspirational, in its way, discussion on the topic of silence. It's simple yet (to me), it's just refreshing, comforting and encouraging.
It must be noted that the person I was talking to is an academic
person who is successful in her own right and so she’s not just saying all this
because she’s disgruntled or bitter.
The discussion left me impressed with what a strong sense of self
can allow a person to achieve.
It is certainly hard to be a self-assured person when the general world does not seem to be agreeing with you. I am inspired by the idea of people who
know who they are, know what they can do, believe in their ideas, have no self-doubts (or at least have very little), and who just go about their own
path, silently, even when the mainstream world constantly dismisses them.
I think this is more impressive than the usual brash and overtly aggressive way of generally acknowledged successful people.
Do not get me wrong, though. I do
have respect for the achievements of “generally acknowledge successful people” and I am by no means anti-extrovert. I have nothing against
outgoing and charming extroverted people who are noteworthy in their
own right. I just find this silent self-assured path of achievement so refreshing and inspired.
And so I end this post on this positive note, as I take a break from this blog, and leave us all to ponder the power of silence :)